Where to walk?
Thoughts and three sets of three haiku, around trying to learn how (and where) we are meant to walk with God, after reading God's invitations to Abraham and Peter in this Sunday's Scriptures.
Heavenly Father, in you we live and move and have our being: We humbly pray you so to guide and govern us by your Holy Spirit, that in all the cares and occupations of our life we may not forget you, but may remember that we are ever walking in your sight; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
-“A Collect for Guidance”, Book of Common Prayer
When Abram was ninety-nine years old, the LORD appeared again to Abram.
And God said to him:
"I am God Almighty; walk before me, and be blameless. And I will make my covenant between me and you, and will make you exceedingly numerous."
Then Abram fell on his face.
And God said to him:
"As for me, this is My Covenant with you: You shall be the ancestor of a multitude of nations.
No longer shall your name be Abram, but your name shall be Abraham; for I have made you the ancestor of a multitude of nations.”
And when He finished talking with him, God went up from beside Abraham.
-Genesis 17:1-5, 22
Then Jesus began to teach them that the Son of Man must undergo great suffering, and be rejected by the elders, the chief priests, and the scribes, and be killed, and after three days rise again.
He said all this quite openly.
And Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him.
But turning and looking at His disciples, to Peter He said,
"Get behind me, Satan! For you are setting your mind not on divine things but on human things."
He then called the crowd with his disciples, and said to them:
"If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.
For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for My sake, and for the sake of the Gospel, will save it.”
-Mark 8:31-35
Almighty God, whose most dear Son went not up to joy but first he suffered pain, and entered not into glory before he was crucified: Mercifully grant that we, walking in the way of the Cross, may find it none other than the way of life and peace; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord. Amen.
-“A Collect for Fridays”, Book of Common Prayer
In this Sunday’s Scripture readings, there is so much movement- walking and going and falling down and procreating and proclaiming and following and picking up and laying down and dying and being resurrected- and all that action is anchored in God's promise of blessing, of His eternally abiding Love for us that is immovable and unchangingly steadfast.
I think it is interesting that these verses (at first) seem slightly confused. Where are we *supposed to be* in relation to God? God comes and stands “beside” Abram, and asks him to walk “before” Him- and then Jesus is standing “beside” Peter, and asks him to walk “behind” God. So, are we meant to walk behind God or before God, or stay standing beside God?
Abram is promised that if he walks before God blamelessly, he gets a new name- one that has an added “ha” sound- the sound of breath, and one of the three letters that makes up God’s most intimately personal name. And God puts that right in the middle of Abram’s new name- Abra(ha)m- reminding all of us that He has put His very Breath both spiritually in middle of our being, and also literally in our lungs, for all of our lives, assuring us that we are loved and are set in the midst of blessings all around. If we just have eyes to see them, ears to hear His promise, and a heart that listens and trusts His Word.
And if Abram doesn't do this- well … Surprise! He still gets part of God’s name set up on him and these blessings. God goes ahead and declares (for the third time now, in a series of increasingly “big” blessings) that Abraham will be blessed and brought into covenant with God without even doing anything on his own part! We sometimes get tangled up with ideas that we need to do something to let God be able to bless us. That's just not how it works- we are not in control of God’s Goodness. Glory to God.
Abraham is so pleasing to God by just simply being close enough to be hearing and seeing the blessings God is promising him- not because he has what we would consider perfect faith or a sinless life. We know from Abraham’s Story that he is actually full of doubt and sin- because God Himself keeps coming back to reassure him that he hasn't messed up the Promise of Blessing for his life- even after (for example) giving Sara(h)i over to be pharaoh's concubine-slave to save his own life. But He knows Abraham’s heart- and He knows the love and childlike exuberance that Abraham has for Him, despite his mistakes.
How Beautiful is His Love for Abraham- and for us.
So, maybe this is all easy enough, right? We need only walk before God with all of our being- not striving for perfection, but just coming with our whole heart, standing beside God, bringing the “good” of us into the Presence of Love along with all that we would consider the “bad” of us. (This is the meaning of “blameless” in this context, according to Jewish midrash.) Actually, it seems that this is pretty hard in practice, at least for me.
But even when we struggle with that, Jesus shows us that He is always coming to help us- especially when we are unable to help ourselves. And as He helps us, Spirit (God’s Breath, what the “ha” in Abra(ha)m and Sara(h)i is symbolic of, remember) will indeed transform us, heal us, and help us receive the blessings that we have always been meant to embrace- but that we resist out of our own shame and guilt and insecurities and unwillingness to just let ourselves be loved for who we are.
How Beautiful is His Love for us.
In the Gospel reading, again, we have God telling us of the Blessing He is giving to us- but Peter (unlike Abraham) isn't willing to see-and-hear. He wants to walk before God- but in his eagerness to be doing that, he also wants to resist Jesus’ invitation to trust in His Promises, His Goodness, and His Love. Peter isn't satisfied to trust in things he doesn't understand, in the unlikely ways of Blessing that God surprises us with.
Despite how we might hear the words “Get behind Me, Satan!” that He directs to Peter, i am convinced that the way He says that is full of tenderness and compassion- not disappointed or angry or condemning. He knows Peter’s heart, and hears the love that Peter has for him that prompts Peter to “rebuke” Him. Our Love for Jesus, even in our mistakes and bad theologies, is never met with anything but divine compassion and kindness and mercy- which are the only things that God uses to bring us truly to repent of the false things that we have been deceived into believing about Him (“satan” conveys a meaning of deceiver or accuser in the Jewish context). Peter may be full of doubts, but here, he certainly brings his whole heart (he walks blameless) before the Lord.
And God honors that- even though Peter is struggling with trust. So, instead of insisting that Peter be like Abraham, Jesus meets Peter where he is. Jesus doesn't ask him (or us!) to do something too hard for him- or even something that He Himself isn’t willing to do. Instead of asking Peter-and-us to “walk before Him” to Golgotha, Jesus shows us all that He is already present there in all of our suffering and pain and death- and invites us to join Him there, to learn and to participate with Him in what True Blessing looks like.
And because of his boldness (misguided or not) Peter gets to see more clearly than Abraham the Promise of Blessing. It unexpectedly looks like walking in the Way of the Cross. And that Way ends with us (but maybe not Peter) standing on a Friday afternoon before the Cross, seeing the One Who Always Sees Us dying to show us the clearest revelation of the depths of His Love for us and bring us with Him into Life Everlasting.
“Peter- you have been deceived into believing that the Way of God looks like the way of the World. Now- hear the Good News! I have come to show you what the Way of God looks like, so you can now walk in Truth- which will set you free, and you can begin to see-and-hear My Promises of Blessing to you! Come and follow Me, so you can see from my example what Power and Honor and Glory and Life and Blessing really look like!”
How Beautiful is His Love for Peter- and for us.
So, now, holding the stories of Abraham and Peter together, and all their individual pieces and parts, let's not miss the Big Story that undergirds them- and all the other Stories in Scripture.
God is always coming to us- to talk with us and to hear our voices talking with Him. And He comes so very close! He is standing beside both Abraham and Peter- He is not a God far off, but very near to all of us. And what we learn later is that He is actually so very near to us that He has united us with Himself in the Incarnation- inseparably. We live because His Spirit lives within us; we die with Him as He takes us with us in His death on the Cross; we are Resurrected with Him by Abba’s Love that is more jealous than the Grave; and we are brought with Him in the Ascension to dwell in the Kingdom Eternal both in this life and the life to come.
Christ is all and in all and fills all things and in Him all things are held together and find their being. And so if nothing else, we can be assured that we can never be apart from His Presence- not if we walk before Him while trusting in His Goodness and Faithfulness (like Abraham), or if we follow behind Him while we are learning to trust His Ways in the middle of all that doesn't seem like Blessing (like Peter), or if even we don’t know what to do and just stay standing beside Him listening to His Voice.
The ultimate Promise of Blessing, of Covenant, of Life, is found just here- not in where we are meant to walking in relation to God- and it is so simple that we miss it so often:
God is with us, He wants to be with us, and He is so, so happy when we want to be with Him- always and eternally.
How Beautiful is His Love for us.
Oh sweet child- Walk on before me Have the joy of discovery Run into Promise You are safe with Me So if (when) you think you are lost And if (when) you fall Turn around and see That I AM running to help you- My Joy made complete Oh sweet child- These paths can be hard And the Way difficult to find So now, follow Me Let Me lead and guide And help you walk in Cross Shaped Life Where dying, you rise And are born into The Glory of The Servant King Just come- be with Me. Oh sweet child- Whether you decide To walk before Me or behind One thing remains true That I dwell in you- I have not left you all alone In My Presence Rest- Here I AM- before, Beside, and behind you always: I love to Love you.
How Beautiful is His Love for us.
To God be the glory for the insights Father, Son, and Holy Spirit have given and continue to give you, Jess. "Our Love for Jesus, even in our mistakes and bad theologies, is never met with anything but divine compassion and kindness and mercy- which are the only things that God uses to bring us truly to repent of the false things that we have been deceived into believing about Him..." Words of love and wisdom in our deconstructing days!
"He has put His very Breath both spiritually in middle of our being, and also literally in our lungs, for all of our lives, assuring us that we are loved and are set in the midst of blessings"
Our breath is His!